Managing the Fun

Ever since the kids got their new Nintendo DSI's, it's been a constant battle with how much time they're allowed to play.  I wasn't keen on getting them in the first place.  David and I told Joshua and Rebecca if they wanted one so bad, they had to save up their own money and buy it themselves.  Secretly, I was hoping they'd give up and their desire would just disappear. 

Well, no such luck.  Josh and Rebecca actually save up their allowances for nearly a year.  They turned down book orders, trips to the dollar store, souvenirs at gift shops, and the bargain bins at Target.  I admit...I was impressed.  So about 6 weeks ago, the DS craze started, and it really hasn't quite tapered down yet. 

Of course, this mean ongoing fights over this darn electronic device.  Christina didn't get a DSI (at at 5 years old, we told her she was too little anyway), so she was always begging to play, and the kids wouldn't heard me if I called them for chores, dinner, etc.  It was driving me NUTS...and that's putting it mildy. I also knew the kids were always bugging me, or asking me to play because I had no rules in place.  David and I knew we had to figure out some system to keep track of playing time, but kept putting it off...end of the school year activities plus swim team left us too mentally drained for anything else.

Finally, last Sunday night, we sat down and came up with a game plan.  First, we came up with a "Nintendo DSI Contract."  It spells out a few simple rules, and the consequences for breaking them.  This includes being prompt and respectful towards Mom and Dad, no sneaking playing time, failure to do chores, etc. 

In addition to the DS Contract, I made up a chart on a dry-erase board.  There are 4 vertical columns--TV, Computer, DSI, and Reading.  The kids' names make up the 3 vertical columns. 

Every day, the kids start out with 1 hour for each category.  They are free to use their time as they like, but once it's up...that's it for the day.  We might make special exceptions if friends show up to play, but so far, it's working well.  I decided not to let the kids watch each other on the TV/Computer/DSI; if they did, it would count towards their time.  This has been a little tricky...obviously it's hard to stop them from watching/playing with a sibling.  But I know if we don't at least try, the kids will complain that they used up all their time watching/playing something they really didn't want to in the first place. 

David wanted the kids to be able to keep track of their time themselves, so he came up with the idea of having timers for each of them.  I bought 3 digital timers at Walmart (at $3 dollars each), and they are magnetized, so they are up on the fridge right below the dry-erase board. 

Whenever the kids want to play/watch something, they go set their timer.  They start with one hour, and if they only want to use 20 minutes, they set the timer for that amount.  I really like these timers...they beep when the time is down to 10 minutes, and again at 5 minutes.  So the kids get 2 warnings, and I don't have to say a thing...awesome!  When their time is up, they erase the "60" on their chart, write down how much time they have left, and zero their timer.  Joshua and Rebecca can do this completely on their own.  Christina needs a little bit of help, but she understand how it works...she has me do the subtraction for her ;-). 

David thought of one more "rule" last night.  The kids have to do their 1 hour of reading sometime during the day.  If they don't, whatever reading time they have left has to be done the following day BEFORE any TV/Computer/DSI time.  I plan to throw in some lessons at some point during the summer that will count towards their reading time. 

So now you wonder, how has this been working thus far? 

Let me tell you...the past 2 days have been SO much more peaceful in our house!  No more yelling at the kids to get off the TV, the DSI, or the computer.  No more bugging Mom, no more fighting over anything.  The kids are negotiating with each other, "Okay, I'll play for 25 minutes, and when I'm done, it'll be your turn."  And best of all, I don't have to play referee!  I'll give you an example. 

Christina got on the computer this afternoon, just before one of Joshua's friends called.  Joshua was none too happy to see his little sister on the computer...he'd made plans to play a game online with his friend earlier that day.  But he called his friend and said, "Sorry, call me back in an hour, my sister is on the computer right now."  No meltdown, no tears.  Before we put this time management system in place, Joshua would have had a HUGE fit. 

As a parent, it is hard to bite the bullet and take the time to plan...I know we should have come up with this system sooner, and procrastinating only made things worse.  At one point, I wanted to throw the DSI's in the trash, and David thought about unplugging the TV...no joke!  But our plan is working so well...I am not dreading this summer at all now.  The kids are managing their times all on their own...it is teaching them to be responsible, fair to their siblings, and I get to keep all my hair.  ;-)

Hope your kiddos aren't driving you crazy this summer!  If they are, send 'em to our house.  We can manage them until you get your game plan together.  But just so you know, I will send them home eventually...I'm liking the peace and quiet over here!